Oh, I'm tired...

You know how when you cry really, really hard, you feel like you need a nap afterwards? Yeah, that's me right now. Seriously, more tears have dribbled off my chin today than they have for a long time. In fact, my whole family's been bawling for the last few hours.

Alright, onto what I need to say.

My dog is dying.

Yeah, it sucks, but she's old, so I've been preparing for a couple of years. Still, losing a pet that's been with you for eleven of your fourteen years of life... It's really hard. I can't remember a time when we didn't have her. My eight-year-old sister used to ride on her back. We have a stool in our bathroom with teeth marks on one corner from when she was teething. That was the only thing she ever chewed up, other than her beds, which she sucked on like they were pacifiers.

So, we found out yesterday. She'd been acting oddly for a few days, and my mom finally caved and took her to the vet. Since the local office wasn't open, she took her to this big emergency clinic. When she got home, she told us that she was dying of some uterus infection, and that there was a surgery we could put her through, but it wasn't guaranteed that she would survive and it was 5000 dollars, which my family couldn't afford in a million years. She might not even make it through the night, she said.

But she did, and my mom - the person who's the most attached to her - decided it was time to put her out of her misery and made an appointment with out local veterinary office to put her to sleep. My brother stayed with our dog over night, and I watched her in the morning while my mom was off teaching summer school.

Eventually, the time of the appointment came, and my mom and dad loaded her into the back of our car, allowing me and my two siblings to say goodbye. We all were crying. I've never personally seen my father cry until this day, and he still somehow managed to seem somewhat cheery, if only for the false benefit of my younger brother and sister. Then, my parents climbed in the car, and we were never going to see that adorable Black Lab again...

But then my mother calls. She told me and my brother that they're going to put her through the surgery.

This all came as a bit of a shock. I feel a bit guilty that the first thought that ran through my head was, "We can't afford it." Then, my mom said that, because they were at a different clinic, the surgery was only 800 dollars. There's still no guarantee that our dog will survive, but the doctors think she has a good chance.

At the moment I write this, I'm waiting for word from my mom about what's happening. If I could ask so much of you, would you pray for her? I'm not a very religious person, but I do believe in God, and I do believe that he sometimes intervenes in the smallest of human affairs. And, if you're an atheist... Fingers crossed? Thanks, to all of you who do.